I came to some realizations over the weekend that I wanted to share with you:
There are differences between making something happen / forcing it to happen / and letting it happen.
I will explain:
Making something happen.
This scenario is for when an opportunity presents itself, and it's time to grab it. Notice, I didn't say that you created the opportunity yourself (I'll get into that later in "forcing"), but the opportunity arises, and you move forward with putting it to good use.
This can be used when finding a new job, or a accepting a new position that opens up - or if a friend offers you a concert ticket on a night that you're free, or if someone you're not sure about just yet asks you on a date and you say "yes". You're seeing an opportunity, not sure what the future will bring, but not shying away from it or making an excuse. You're embracing the challenge or experience, and making it a part of your life.
Forcing something to happen.
This is when you have to take charge. You need to make a decision to get out of a bad situation, or to open up your time to make something better happen down the road.
This decision can be helpful when making career changes, or with leaving toxic relationships. It should not be used to try and force a relationship to happen, or to initiate change when it's not ready to happen. Yes, change and growth is important - but it's up to you to asses when it's appropriate to force the change, and when you need to step back and accept that it could simply not be the right time. Take a moment to reflect on the situation and ask yourself, "Why am I trying so hard to force this to happen? Is it truly benefiting me, or distracting me from my other goals?"
Making something happen is different, as you seize the opportunity to walk a path that has already been laid - not cutting down trees to forage your own path. There's a difference between making additional and possibly unnecessary work for yourself (forcing), and taking a turn down a path less traveled (making).
Letting it happen.
This is the most passive choice of the three, but also a very important one. This also involves not forcing a change, but choosing to go with the flow and let chance take over. Sometimes just choosing to live your life in a way that makes you happy and not worrying about pushing any results can bring fulfillment that you didn't expect.
Whether you have to make it happen, force it to happen, or simply sit back and let it happen - understanding your motivation is the first step.